Sparkloves and Bondmates
by WiEGoP
Summary: G1. When a member of the Autobot team does something unspeakable how will the the rest of the team cope? Can Prowl's love for his bondmate save Jazz from the darkness threatening to overcome him? And what about those wacky Twins? Please read and review PJ


Prowl wwalked down the halway of the ark, towards his offices, away from Tracks room. He passed Bluestreak in the hallways.

"hey there prowl, how's it going? you going ot see Jazz? See I talk a lot you know, and it's going to annoy you becaue you know, that's my character LOL." Bluestreaked babbled inanely "Look I'm going to dump a bucha names of characters that never actually get real stories written about them because they aren't pretty enough. Gears, Huffer, Brawn, Bumblebee kissing Optimus Prime in the Dinobot Cave with the Immobilizer. Inane babble." Bluestreak babbled inanely.

Prowl Frowned placidly, "logic?" He asked, logically.

Bluestreak laughed hysterically, his doorwings tilting sexily up and down. " No you see, My sexy ceaseless babble is used for useless exposition except when I'm getting raped by Starscream, LOL you know, all the time heh heh." Suddenly blue grabbed Prowl's shoulders, "THEY DESTROYED MY ENTIRE CITY!" He cried out in spark crushing agony, he fell to the floor weeping suggestively "My WHOLE CITy, and do you know why I'm the only survivor you know? Because of Starscream….he interfaced with me is what I'm saying heh heh. I have so much ANGST, and it's all CANONICAL.! YOU KNOW!?" Bluestreak grabbed Prowl's shoulders again, "I'm so angstlily inane! Listen to me babble! Lets Make OUT!" Bluestreak moved in closer, his doorwings waggilying suggestively, "We're both DATSUNS see! So we MUST be in LOVE!"

Prowl Pushed Bluestreak away with logic, "I have a battle computer…I am logical…thus I am like robot spock, and robot spock says that Optimus Prime dosen't have a face, so he can't be kissing Bumblebee in the dinobot cave. You cannot deny my logic, it's so damn logical."

Ratchet ran through the hallways wielding a massive wrench, he ran right over Bluestreak who fell into a swoon at being crushed by such a strong and sadistic mech. Rachet was so very very angry and grumpy. Sexily.

"Gwwwar," he grumped, "I am such a grumpy medic! Watch me hate everyone and everything, but especially those twins!" Ratchets face turned red and he shouted down the hall! "Damn you twins! Why must you constantly pull ridiculously retarded pranks on me! Especially when we are making hot sweet sexy robot loves! Can't you see how grumpy I am! Dosen't it just turn you on!" Ratchet threw another wrench which exploaded in midair.

"Whoops sorry!" Wheeljack exclaimend running in from another room, which exploaded, "That was my wrench, you know that it wasw my wrench because it exploaded! LOL! Everything that I make exploads! See! It's funny!" Wheeljacks dialog exploded. No one laughed and then Wheeljack exploaded. Bay thought it was awesome. There were tigers.

"Ohhhhh slag" Grumped Ratchet grumpily, "now I will have to fix him again." Bluestreak laughed, so Ratchet kicked him in the face. Bluestreak swooned again! "Love ME! I'm so angsty and crazy! Use me as your spaniel!"

Prowl shot Bluestreak a warning glare, "Logic." he warned. "Ice cold, hot steamy, rock solid logic." He resisted the urge to kiss him, as it was not logic.

The twins ran like hilarious hijinks in to the hallways followed by angry Tracks. The twins were soo scared because they had sjust pranked Tracks, by doing soemthighin retarded that Tracks would have totally scene coming if he hadn't be otherwise occupied doing unspeakable acts.

"I'm so SHINY!" Sunstreaker cried out as he ripped Bluestreak limb from limb, "See how much of an evil guy I am!" Bluestreak died happy, and his doorwings twitched on the ground sexiliy.

Ratchet Grumped "now I will hafve to fix him again " Ratchet shouted, while he felt Sideswipe up with a wrench. Sideswipe smiled, "I showed up in almost no episodes but everyone and the grils loves me because I am a twin and I pull pranks." Sideswipe and Sunstreaker kissed like Luke and Leia but so much hotter Cux they're both robot guyz. while Trailbreaker entered the hallway.

"hey guys! It's actually my tech specs that mention pulling pranks! SO why don't you let me use my FORCEFIELD! To help you guys pull some real great pranks!" Sunstreaker kneeed Trailbreaker in the groin! "I'm SO EVIL and DECEPTICON LIKE!" He screamed. \

"Forcefield…..why…."Trailbreaker wheezed

Prowl thought in a very cop way, kinda like that CSI guy, or the other one with the glasses… "I have deduiced Traileberaker, that you are too ugly to be in any fanfiction at all." He glared menacingly placidly, " I used LOGIC to come to that conculsion"

Trailbreaker exploaded, with a bang of ugly, everyone forgot that he had even been there.

Ironhide came out of the medbay, and punched sideswipe, who was licking Ratchet's windshield, in the face, "Aarrrrrr…taht th'er mech 'es mah mahn luver! Weh kenh'da lahk tha' sahm ….aaaahhhhhrrrr ……sa' weh mahst beh ah'n Lahv arrrrrrrrr….." Ratchet ran a thick metal finger down Ironhide's windsheilf. "It makes me so grumpy when you try and phoneltically spell a southern accent sugar bot." Then they shared big boxy kisses togethers. Ironhide punched Tracks in the face too.

Oih Hey!!! Tracks sneered, "Watch the finish! I just got done raping Jazz!"

Prowl was startled. Which was startling for Prowl, since it was an emotion that wasn't logic and logical.

He ran down the hallway past the dinobot cave where Optimus and Bumblebee were kissing. Optimus dosen't have a mouth. Prowl was find Jazz lying in a pool of energon.

"Jazz!" he screamed. "Jazz! Why? Oh Why? Jazz!" He gentley cradled the wounded bot's head. "Logic can't save you!" The tears were pouring out of his sexy shiny optical eyes.

"heeey man," Jived Jazz painfully, "Don't be raining on my scene cat. I'mma taking a one way ticket to splitlsville. It's the day the music died bro."

"But why YOU?" Prowl moaned his logic completely melting away now that the angst was being laid on thick. He violently frenched Jazz's faceplates.

"Cuz my main mech..I'm the only ethnic bot in this hood." Jazz coughed. "Why there be hating brother?"

"Wait!" Prowl moaned suggestively, his enticing doorwings curling forward, despite being made of metal, to shield his honeybot. "I know what will save you…he whispered, and I know it will save you because I used…."

Jazz put his finger on Prowls lips as his other hand did other things that were also interesting. "If you say logical one more time man…Imma gonna bust your head in." Then they totally frenched, "I'll save you with my sparkloves." Prowl moaned as he opened his spark chamber.

Skyfire suddenly walked in. "Heya guys! Tracks rape Jazz again? I just going out to make out with Starscreme, so if you need someone to fly you to peru again I suggest you all just go get Omega Supreme."

"We can't! Hound cried from within his hologram of Jazz's recharghing booth.

"He's interfacing with the constructicons to try and heal them again!" Mirage said, invisible on top of the hologram of the recharging booth.

"Oh Sweet Sweet Logic!" shouted Prowl.

And they all lived happily ever Aftrer:-P


End file.
